What is a narcissist?

2–3 minutes

Table of Contents

How to tell if someone is a narcissist

What makes a person a narcissist

Self-Centred
- Constantly thinking about themselves
- Focus on getting their own needs met (often ignoring the needs of others)
Sense of entitlement or superiority
- Feeling that they are always right
- Feeling that they are better or deserve more than other people
Lack of empathy
- Lacking compassion and feeling for other people
Manipulative or controlling
- Us emotions to manipulate people
Strong need for admiration
- Demands admiration and praise
- Like to be the centre of attention
- Upset if they are not in the spotlight
Difficulty taking feedback
- Over-act to criticism
- Have a hard time admitting when they are wrong
Easily wounded
- Quick to feel hurt or angry
- Frequently feel wronged by others

Anatomy of a narcissist

Appears to be very social
Seeks people who are kind yet vulnerable
Very jealous and deep insecure
Control freak
Induces shame to make you feel worthless
Doesn’t take responsibility
Plays victim
Addicted to anything that is superficial
Perfect manipulators, makes you question your own reality
Isolates you from others
Ignores when you feel
Appears to be very charming
Pathological liar
Fear of rejection
No real friends
Lack of boundaries
Ignores boundaries
Highly stressed and angry
Fear of being alone
Play mind games
Heightened sense of self and entitlement
Emotionally fragile and hypersensitive
Gaslighting
It’s always about them
Belittles you
Blames other but herself
Takes credit for other people’s work
Will never apologises for their mistakes
Criticise people a lot
Talk more than they listen
Loses their temper
Treat other poorly
Are self-obsessed
Two-faced, critical of others behind their backs
Acts different in public and private

What they appear to be like:

Charming
Confident
Extrovert or quiet and isolated
Sociable
Caring
Charismatic

Eight things you can’t do with a narcissist

Have friends
Find peace
Share good times
Be guaranteed of success
Be comforted
Reach consensus
Hear truth
Reach your true potential

Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissistic abuse is also a form of emotional abuse. This can happen to anyone (in a relationship or by a friend).

Signs of narcissistic abuse

Physical health deterioration
Increased irritability and anxiety
Low self-worth
You blame yourself
You feel isolated
You never feel like you are good enough.
You forget your emotional needs
You detach from your loved ones/friends
Feeling controlled and manipulated
You question your sanity and critical thinking
You justify and empathise with a narcissist
You give up your values and try to always please a narcissist

9 responses to “What is a narcissist?”

Michelle

2 May 2023

Reading your post made me realise that I was best friends with a narcissist for a few years. Luckily said ‘friend’ is a stranger now.

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1. JaimeGraceUK
  
  2 May 2023
  
  Yes I was recently friends with someone who turned out to be a narcissist. It has really knocked my confidence.
  
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Sneha

14 May 2023

This post sums up everything about a narcissist. Unfortunately often people who are experiencing a narcissistic abuse don’t realize that they are being emotionally abused. And that’s a big challenge— to identify a narcissist around us. Awareness is extremely important. Thank you!

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1. JaimeGraceUK
  
  14 May 2023
  
  Ya I am a survivor of narcissistic abuse many times over. I know all about narcissist but don’t see it in people who are around me its like I am blind to it. This is why I write this blog so I can make others aware of it and that I can refer back if I need to.
  
  Reply
E.N. Chanting

28 November 2023

This is a great blog, full of great information. My mother was married to a narcissist. It was a brutal divorce. We found out so many vile things he was doing behind her back. He was cheating with multiple women and prostitutes. He abused her emotionally for almost 25 years. She’s still trying to recover from the lasting trauma. She is a wonderful, kind, talented person and he had her believing she was nothing. It’s a horrible situation and excruciating to escape.

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1. JaimeGraceUK
  
  28 November 2023
  
  Sorry to hear about your mother’s struggles
  
  Reply
Molly | Transatlantic Notes

29 November 2023

I recognise the traits of a narcissist in a previous partner and how emotionally manipulative he was—this was a long time ago, but I still remember it. It’s very good to spread awareness about this; thanks for sharing.

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Kevin Foodie

30 November 2023

My Manager fits your every definition of a Narcissist. I always knew she was based on her behavior and attitude. Narcissistic leaders are the worst kind of people. Thanks for sharing this with us.

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1. JaimeGraceUK
  
  30 November 2023
  
  ya i totally get it as you can’t really go to her to complain as she is the one who is causing the problems. you are trapped really and she we use her narcissistic behaviour to her advantage.
  
  Reply